# Who Alexis was before Patagonia

- **Episode:** [113](https://agents.truthliesandwork.com/episodes/113.md) (2024-07-09)
- **Type:** interview
- **Tags:** leadership-style, patagonia, early-career
- **Time:** 7:47–8:29 (start 467s)
- **Listen:** [https://truthliesandwork.com/113?t=467](https://truthliesandwork.com/113?t=467)

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[7:47] Al Elliott: So what sort of leader do you think you were back in the Patagonian days?
[7:51] Alexis Zahner: Patagonia is me trying to be a better person, to be honest. Before that, I wasn't a great person. I'd worked in very commission-orientated, sales-driven cultures I was extremely cutthroat. I've always been very accomplishment-driven. I grew up playing football at a very high level and then played in female football premier leagues here in Australia, so I was used to competitive environments. I was used to achieving, and I was used to doing that at all costs. If that meant taking down opposition, I was very comfortable doing so. So in my young career, I think I became quite a toxic person
[8:29] Al Elliott: Yeah
[8:29] Alexis Zahner: To be completely honest with you. And it wasn't until I sort of had a few things happen in my life— the loss of a parent, some relationships unraveled— that I realized that who I was and what my work was pushing me to be was actually really flowing through into the rest of my life and making me a lesser version of myself, a more toxic person, and someone who struggled to really connect deeply in relationships both inside and outside of work. And I just become this version of myself that I didn't love and that I didn't like looking at in the mirror. So through taking some time off and then finding this opportunity at Patagonia in Canada, it was really the first time I'd had the space and the trust from a company to be all of me in the workplace. And actually, they supported me to sort of learn the ropes of leading others through that as well. So it was the first time I'd had my work-life balance respected. I wasn't expected to work over the hours that I was being paid for. I was supported from the general manager directly to develop my skills in leadership to better lead my team. And I was allowed to make mistakes, which was something that for the entirety of my adult life and career so far had been utterly terrifying, especially coming from those very cutthroat environments, mistakes feel almost threatening, um, on a very real physical level. So it was the first time I was given the space to learn on the job, make mistakes, learn from those mistakes, and move through that. So I think for me, Patagonia was actually a turning point and my first experience in a culture that saw me as a whole person. So it was very cool