# Workplace Surgery: Remote work boundaries

- **Episode:** [152](https://agents.truthliesandwork.com/episodes/152.md) (2024-12-10)
- **Type:** workplace-surgery
- **Tags:** remote-work, boundaries, work-life-balance
- **Time:** 39:02–44:20 (start 2342s)
- **Listen:** [https://truthliesandwork.com/152?t=2342](https://truthliesandwork.com/152?t=2342)

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[39:02] Leanne Elliott: Yeah, very common problem. And I think we actually— I think, was it last Tuesday we talked about the latest research is out on hybrid and remote work? And that is a recognised problem with remote working and working from home, is that those boundaries do start to blur, and we have to be really strict about them. The first thing I would, I would do some reflection on is where is this pressure coming from? Is it coming from you to answer emails at all times? Is it coming from your manager to answer all emails at all times? Could it be potentially a combination of both? And really pinpoint where that pressure is coming from, because once you do, you can then really look at that through a lens of setting some expectations. So what are the expectations of me in terms of my work? When, how, you know, how responsive am I expected to be? How accessible do I need to be? Um, for my manager, for my team, for my clients. And just then get yourself some, just some basic rules and, and realistic expectations. 9 times out of 10, managers don't expect you to be around late in the evening, but they might also appreciate that that might be when you decide to answer your emails. Because a great thing about working from home is it allows that flexibility. flexibility. So I know lots of people who will, you know, finish work at 3 o'clock, go and pick up their kids, um, do the whole, you know, bedtime, dinner, bedtime routine, pick up their laptop again at 8 o'clock, answer emails until 10, and then that suits them perfectly. So I think it's, it's first of all understanding the actual situation that you have, and then it's really just looking at how do you set some very clear boundaries. And I mean like Be strict. And they can be really simple things. One thing that works really well for us and has done, because we've worked remotely since 2013, well before the pandemic, and one thing that worked really well for us was to have a separate space for the office. And I know that's luxury, and believe me, when we first started doing it, we didn't have a separate room we could use as an office. But what we do is we get one of those screens that would then like hide the, hide the desk that we worked at, um, in the evening to just— you don't have that visual trigger. of it. Another thing we've done that we've talked about before is in terms of talking about work, particularly if you work at home with somebody else, whether that's the same job or otherwise, trying to set some, you know, some boundaries that you agree on in terms of when do we talk about work, how long can that conversation go on for, can I check in with you first and just see if you're happy for me to have this conversation, that you have the energy for it. And it can seem over-formal, And yes, it needs to be over-formal, because until that boundary becomes a habit, and we know that that can take, what, 3 months typically, as the research shows us, to form that more concrete habit that's gonna stick, it needs to be that formal, it needs to be that forced. There's lots of other things that you can do. I think one thing that a lot of us do miss about our commute is actually having that time to transition from work to life. It was a very literal transition, and I think we're missing that now. So, there's other ways you can do it. I've heard of people who will go for a 20-minute walk, walk afterwards, or that's when they'll walk the dog, or that's when they'll go to the gym. Other ones I've heard of is that's when people will book in that coaching session to help them decompress from the day, or that's when they'll finish their day with 45 minutes of journaling to help with that transition. So, something like that can be really helpful. There's loads of different things, and the minute you start Googling up this, you're going to find loads of different suggestions, but they're only going to work if you first understand the expectations that are on you in terms of the expectations of yourself and the expectation of your employer. Because until you're clear on that, then any boundary setting is just gonna be kind of guesswork, probably won't stick, and probably won't work out
[42:47] Al Elliott: Excellent advice. I read, um, I read of someone who basically went out their back door and came in their front door, um, at the beginning of work and did the reverse, uh, as like kind of a way of switching off. Um, if you've got kids and it's like, it's difficult to do that, then you know, try and take the kids to the park or something, or even down to the shop and get an ice cream. I don't know what we'd— I'd have kids, I don't know what you do with kids, uh, but that sort of thing. Um, another thing which I used to have and I want to go back to— this is the— we can have a little chat about this off air, but I want to go back to is my core 4, um, in that I used to have 4 hours a day, uh, it's usually in the morning, that was that you just couldn't talk to me. Like, you literally, you're not allowed to. And if there's a problem, I mean, if the house is on fire, fair enough, but otherwise Leave it till I finish my core 4. Um, and that was something which I really helped because I got so much done in those 4 hours that I felt that even if I— even if it was more difficult to get the rest of the work done during the day because it was like, I don't know, there was other distractions, at least I got a decent amount of work done. And, and that was sort of psychologically really good. Um, there's lots and lots of stuff. There's loads of research on this. Obviously, after we've spent so much time in the pandemic at home, then loads and loads of blog articles about how— about all of this work-life balance. Uh, but if you are still struggling with you want perhaps to have a chat with Leanne, then, um, Leanne's email's in the show notes. Drop her an email and she'll talk to you. Okay, Leanne, question number 3. This is a business owner who writes, and they say, the year at my company has been tough but profitable, so I wanted to really treat the team. It sounds really nice. I've booked an amazing venue for our Christmas party, arranged live entertainment, and even organised luxury transport home