# Workplace Surgery Q1: My boss keeps adding context (but they're wrong) - **Episode:** [174](https://agents.truthliesandwork.com/episodes/174.md) (2025-02-25) - **Type:** workplace-surgery - **Tags:** management, feedback, context - **Time:** 32:19–37:23 (start 1939s) - **Listen:** [https://truthliesandwork.com/174?t=1939](https://truthliesandwork.com/174?t=1939) --- [32:19] Veerle Numan: Yes [32:19] Al Elliott: Okay, so the question number 1. My boss keeps adding context, but he's actually wrong. So this person writes, my new manager constantly interrupts me during presentations and team meetings to add context to the room, often contradicting what I'm saying. It's undermining my credibility with clients and with teammates. The frustrating part is they're often wrong about technical details but won't actually listen to corrections. Is there any way to stop them from doing this? [32:46] Leanne Elliott: I, I guess bring it to their attention. Have you had a conversation? with your manager about it. And I know it's a little bit awkward, but sometimes it's more about talking to somebody about what you need, you know, what you need in that moment to communicate the information you need to in that presentation the most impactful way and the way that's best for you. That if she has any feedback or wants to add any context, can she tell you that ahead of time? You find it really derailing to have those interruptions during the presentation, find it hard to get back on track and maintain that clarity. I think it's having that conversation from your perspective, what you need [33:19] Al Elliott: Yeah [33:20] Leanne Elliott: in those meetings whilst also then trying to diplomatically manage when she does, or they— she, he, did they say they? [33:28] Al Elliott: I don't think they actually said they [33:29] Leanne Elliott: Or when your leader gives you that, when they try and add context that's incorrect, trying ways to ask it, actually, I think it is this way. Ultimately, I would approach it in the first instance from what you need from her in those moments to be able to do your job. most effectively to the best of your ability. Ultimately, if you're being trusted to deliver these presentations, there is a reason, whether it's part of your role, your expertise, that you've proven to be particularly good at it in the past. I think that's your first point really, is have that conversation through the lens of, this is what I need from you as a supportive manager in these moments [34:04] Al Elliott: Yeah, I think it's quite telling because it's actually written, refused to accept corrections. So, it sounds like this person, this person writing in, is actually saying, Look, that's not quite right. Um, and, um, you know, and this manager's not accepting it. I would probably look at it from less of a point of view of how am I, how can I make it stop? And more like, why is this person, why is this manager doing it? Um, a lot of reasons why people— and Leanne, I'm going to come over to you in a second for the psychology behind it, Leanne. But I think that in my experience, people who sort of jump in in that scenario, they tend to feel like they want to show they're important. They want to show that they too are part of the solution, and they don't want— [34:43] Veerle Numan: Yeah [34:44] Al Elliott: That, you know, the client, for example, to go, oh well, Derek or Jane is the person presenting, they, they're the expert. And so I'm not really sure what this manager's doing here because it looks like they're just sitting there making some notes. So perhaps it's a bit of an insecurity. Leanne, what are your thoughts? [34:58] Leanne Elliott: Yeah, it might, it might well be. It might well be an insecurity, them feeling they have to contribute to, to be seen and have some kind of reason for being there. Equally, even if that is the case, that might Might help you, listener, to give— maybe have some empathy for this person in that moment. But equally, it's going to be hard to say that to them, oh, I think you're just insecure and that's why you're reacting in these meetings. And it is then saying, what I really need from my manager in that moment that I find really helpful is X, Y, and Z. And then, you know, reinforce that behaviour by praising it, reinforce that behaviour by telling your colleagues and your superiors about how great it is when you have to give feedback on your manager, how they give you that autonomy in those moments while you're feeling supported in terms of the preparation side of it [35:40] Veerle Numan: Yeah [35:41] Leanne Elliott: Really, you can only, you can only do so much in terms of changing somebody else's behavior. And, and typically, if we, if we try and use positive, um, ways of doing that, positive reinforcement and positive, um, behavior modifications through the lens of what you need, it's going to be more, more effective. But you're absolutely right, Al, the root cause of it is more than likely insecurity [36:01] Al Elliott: Interesting. I think maybe as an actual tactic, um, this is what I would suggest if, if Try Leanne's way first. And then if that doesn't work, perhaps there's something in sales called the damaging admission, where you tend to sort of, you get a bit of like trust by saying something that is an admission of something. So in this example, perhaps going to your manager and saying, look, I'm really sorry, I do get a little bit nervous during these presentations. And then when you jump in with your thoughts, you completely throw me off and I lose where I am in, you know, in this presentation. So would you mind for the next few Till I get back on my feet. Just sort of like keeping your thoughts to the very end, or at least when I finish doing my bit, then you can go back over to your bit because, you know, and that sort of thing, even though it's not true, that sort of thing might make the manager go, okay, I'll have my own bit, or, oh yeah, maybe I want this to go well, so perhaps I should do that. Anyway, Lee, that is question number 1. Question number 2. My top performer is toxic. I've inherited a team where only one member— sorry, I've inherited a team where one member is a brilliant jerk, this person's written. Exceptional at their job, but terrible with people. They're responsible for 40% of our department's output, but their behaviour is affecting team morale. Previous managers have avoided addressing this because of their performance, but how do I handle this without risking losing this person?