# Strategic silence as a leadership skill - **Episode:** [205](https://agents.truthliesandwork.com/episodes/205.md) (2025-06-12) - **Type:** interview - **Tags:** silence, leadership, strategic-communication - **Time:** 12:49–19:15 (start 769s) - **Listen:** [https://truthliesandwork.com/205?t=769](https://truthliesandwork.com/205?t=769) --- [12:49] Al Elliott: Yeah. And we've already found out that senior executives become more direct. As they gain the confidence because they know their time is valuable, they cut straight to the results. The highest performers don't say things like, I strategically leverage cross-functional synergies to optimize revenue trajectories. They say, I increase sales by 90% [13:08] Cheryl Robinson: Yeah [13:09] Leanne Elliott: And communication isn't just about word choice. Dr. Cheryl's about to show that knowing when to stay quiet can be just as powerful [13:17] Al Elliott: Strategic silence is a leadership skill. Was that something you said? [13:21] Cheryl Robinson: I did, yes. Being a great listener, there's value in that, especially in leadership, because it shows that you genuinely care about your team member and that you're giving them that space to share feedback, to express how they're feeling, and A lot of leaders are used to just constantly speaking, and it's like being in a relationship, especially a new relationship where there's that awkward silence and it's, should you say something? Shouldn't you say something? When studies show that if you can be comfortable not talking, being silent around someone, that means that your relationship is extremely strong. Because you could just be in each other's presence without having to fill that air. And I believe that to be true in leadership, that there is a time and place when you just need to take a step back and listen to what is going on around you, because that's where you're gonna learn the most valuable information that is going on with your team [14:41] Leanne Elliott: Yeah [14:42] Al Elliott: If I'm a leader sitting in a, in a meeting, there's 6 people of my team around us and we're all talking and I'm using this strategic silence to allow them to talk so I can listen. I think I might be concerned they think I don't know what I'm talking about. I don't know anything. So that's why he's staying quiet. Am I thinking about this the wrong way? [15:02] Cheryl Robinson: Yes and no. Because my follow-up question to you would be, what is your relationship with those team members? Do you, have you built trust? Are they open with you in general? Do they support you? Do they manage up? And if you answered yes to all that, then no, I don't think that they think you're an idiot. I think they're, you're doing your leadership thing. You're assessing the situ— situation, you're listening. to what they're saying. And then you could be one of those quiet leaders who then all of a sudden say something so profound, the whole team goes, oh yeah, we never thought of it that way. Yeah, this is what we need to do. But now, if you're one of those leaders who you just use the jargon, the fluff, whenever you talk, you never ask them how they're doing, what stress they might be under, what are some of their project challenges. Yes, I think they would think you're an idiot if you're not saying anything [16:10] Al Elliott: Let's imagine that someone is now sitting with their senior leadership. So there's all their bosses and their bosses' bosses, and they're at the table and they're a little bit excited, intimidated, but they also want to, want to, you know, play the strategic silence from Dr. Robinson's playbook [16:28] Cheryl Robinson: You shouldn't be silent the whole meeting. You shouldn't interrupt. You also shouldn't use the jargon. And I think when you become a leader, you know when to interject. Or let me rewind. Good leaders know when to interject. And I don't think they see silence as weakness. They see it as you're waiting for your moment where you're the expertise to chime in as to what to do. I think a lot of times, and this is just my personal belief, is that when you get to those top, you know, C-suite level positions, They do invite a lot of people to meetings, and there's so many chefs in the kitchen that they don't know how to handle it. So if you're one to just be self-aware and know when to interject, I think they see that as great leadership and someone that they can trust because you're not just trying to fill the air. You're not just trying to— Yeah. BS them with fluff words that mean absolutely nothing. But when you speak, it's valuable. So let me tell you a story, and I learned this early on. I interviewed this woman probably month 3 of having my column. So I was a newbie. I asked her, so briefly, Tell me how you got to where you are today. And typically people take about 5 minutes to share that story. She took 45 minutes. Now, bad on me. I should have cut her off at marker 10, but I just let her talk because there were some key nuggets, you know, in there that of information that I was like, okay, but she talked and talked and talked [18:46] Al Elliott: Yeah [18:47] Cheryl Robinson: And after that, at the 45 minutes when she was like, oh, so do you, what are some of the other questions you have for me? I said, no, we're good because I was so zoned out at that point. But I said, I will never, ever do that to myself again. And the best interviews I have last 10 minutes. If they know how to share their stories. 10 minutes, we're good. And we're moving on