# 'My work is not actually about burnout'

- **Episode:** [22](https://agents.truthliesandwork.com/episodes/22.md) (2023-01-17)
- **Type:** interview
- **Tags:** burnout, purpose, coaching
- **Time:** 27:51–30:08 (start 1671s)
- **Listen:** [https://truthliesandwork.com/22?t=1671](https://truthliesandwork.com/22?t=1671)

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[27:51] Jim Young: I've been coming to this realization Over the last few months that my work is not actually about burnout, that my work is actually about intimacy. That as people in this modern society that's so fast and so distributed and so disconnected in so many ways, we've lost some essential parts of what makes life so rich. And burnout is a condition that I went through that got me to intimacy. Intimacy is how I got—
[28:27] Al Elliott: Yeah
[28:27] Jim Young: beyond my days of burnout, my years of burnout. By investing in intimate relationships across every area of my life, I started to free up the space where I couldn't burn out anymore. And so I know that that is— it's not even just our species that craves connection, that is wired for connection. It's part of all life. And when we are so cut off from each other, when we're isolated, We burn out. We can't sustain ourselves when we don't have social support. Study after study proves that out. So that's really like deep within me is I want connection. I was a lonely, shy kid, right? It comes from there. I didn't know how to connect with people in the world. It took me a long time to figure that out. And I know a lot of people struggle with that. And I know a lot of men in particular are told—
[29:23] Al Elliott: Yeah
[29:23] Jim Young: Don't show your emotional side. And that's where we connect from. That's how we build intimacy is by revealing our emotional reality. So for me, I see so much pain and suffering for men, and it's unnecessary. And there's pain and suffering for everyone. I can speak to the male condition. So that's what I choose to do
[29:45] Al Elliott: Totally agree with you. I was lonely, awkward child. And, you know, and the number of times that people just say, oh, just man up, you know, and it's just, I don't know what that means and I don't know how to do it. So tell me, if you— what would you like to see leaders and managers doing to help prevent or even recognize burnout?